The Price of Disobedience - A Subs Thoughts
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A few months ago, I had a temporary drop in income, and my more rational side decided that it would have a go at resisting my divine Princess’ power over me. For a couple of days, not only did I not carry out Princess’ instructions, but I didn’t even bother acknowledging her message. My irritating rational side was convinced that unless work picked up again very soon, I was on a slippery slope to bankruptcy. Subconsciously I also thought that, even though the beatings might be more severe, she would be happier to accept lesser tributes when I was ready to give them than dismiss me entirely.
Oh boy, how wrong I was! Whilst she is to an extent mindful of the financial abilities of each individual slave, for her it really is about Total Control. An order is an order. End of story. Despite potentially forfeiting my not-insignificant tributes entirely, she choose to dismiss me completely rather than continue owning a slave who picked and chose which orders he would obey and which orders he wouldn’t. She told me to go and find another mistress to serve and that I was essentially dead to her.
Although I was clearly very saddened by this dismissal, her actions nevertheless put her, in my eyes, on an even higher pedestal and my admiration, respect and love for her grew exponentially. She really is the supreme female that all us submissives have always dreamt about, but never thought actually existed.
I had no intention of finding another mistress, but continued to admire her from afar though her videos, twitter and website. I continued to send her small gifts and tributes, not necessarily to try to get back into her good books, but mainly just to thank her for existing and for doing what she does so well. It also made me feel that I still had a small role to play in her life.
Although I wasn’t expecting it, my continued acts of devotion eventually led to a message from her (and an amazing personalised video) stating that my selfless devotion to her hadn’t gone unnoticed and that she may be willing to give me one last chance, subject to immaculate behaviour at all times. I was soooo delighted! Anyhow a month or so later, she instructed me to come back and serve her again in person. I was over the moon as I was genuinely convinced I would never get to see her again. I knew it wasn’t going to be an easy session given my errant behaviour, but it actually turned out far worse than I could have ever imagined. Princess promptly cancelled the meeting on the day with instructions to pay her the session fee regardless, as that was part of my punishment. I then realised it was going to be a huge uphill climb to get back to the stage I was at before my period of misdemeanours, but life was just too empty without her and I was willing to do whatever it takes.
Princess instructed me to come again the following week… no, no cancellation this time. But I did receive the hardest caning I have ever experienced. That seemed like a very small price to pay for the pleasure and honour of being able to serve her once again. I have now truly learnt my lesson. With Princess it really is all or nothing, and I love and respect her more than ever knowing that. I also know there will be no further chances if I fail her again, and thus henceforth I will gleefully and unwaveringly obey her every order. She now owns me completely.